Ever since I bought the Groupon ("Honey, I have to go to this sushi place, get my hair lasered and spend the day in a Russian Banya on Coney Island Avenue by next Tuesday!) I have been really looking forward to boxing lessons! I mean c'mon, 4 private lessons! How stupid can I look? AND I get to wear boxing gloves so the stupidity factor is already elevated to way cool! So, the lesson is at noon, and in my infinite wisdom I decide to warm up with 2 hours at the gym: an hour on the eliptical, some weights, 100 situps... in retrospect, not one of my best plans (of course far from one of my worst plans. Can you say "drinking two bottles of wine and showing up late and rowdy to my front row seats at Rent on Broadway?" Yeah, well.... it sucked anyway until we were asked to leave after 15 minutes!)
Anyway, boxing gym, cool. Anthony who is laid back and knows how to throw a punch, cool. Getting my hands wrapped, wearing boxing gloves and punching a 200 lb bag, way cool. Thirty minutes of warm up exercises broken down into intervals of 3 and a half minutes each, sucks ass. And one of the worst parts, you have to look in the mirror the whole time! Definitely not one of my strong suits. After all, nothing says "kick ass" like watching your breasts bounce around in the supposedly best sports bra available while sweat is pouring down your face. And there is no kinda happiness in big Anthony watching you throw a punch and that loose ball of fat under your arm springs forth as if it could assist in some way, like, "Hey! Watch out! If I punch hard enough this underarm granny fat it going to fly off and smack you in the face and you will be grossed out for life!"
All in all, I made it through my first lesson. And even with Anthony saying such inspirational things like, "Well you're not really going to learn that much in 4 lessons so you really have to pay attention to the technique." That was yesterday, and everything hurts! And I have to buy a garment bag to wash my wraps. My bras, I just throw that in with my regular clothes, but not my boxing wraps! I am definitely in for at least these 3 more lessons. Pain equals strength, right? And I am certainly going to get a lot of use out of the boxing gloves, which I very well could be wearing all day today as diva sits at the table and whines about her 3rd grade homework. Oh, and I just got a report/tattle that JBear is throwing legos at the tv. Guess it's time to wrap my hands.
